Drive a car with an air-conditioner and a clean windshield so you can see the awesome green.

Stay in West Asheville at an airbnb that’s a room under a porch in a backyard garden.

Sit at the bar at the Admiral because you forgot to make a reservation and enjoy great food, wine and ice cream.

Smile on the deck of Urban Orchard and drink jalapeno cider and gasp at the fresh air and empty streets.

Float the French Broad River which is just that, broad, slow and shallow- and fight off ducks with your oar who think you’re after their ducklings.

Don’t forget to use sunscreen on the river so you’re not baked to a piggly pink and gooped with aloe for the rest of your trip.

Do take a six pack of beers with you to drink while you float (don’t litter).

Stroll downtown and see the public art and hear the old street bands busking (do tip).

Grab a tall table at Curate and take whatever they recommend and call it the “Spanish Surprise” and remind yourself you’re not in Barcelona.

Also, order a porron and test your aim with a long fountain pour. Don’t laugh and miss your mouth and feel lucky you’re wearing grey and no one can tell you spilled.

Walk ten minutes south to any of the top notch breweries and be completely giddy and overwhelmed.

Notice that Burial Beer Co. does a collaboration with Other Half and tell the bartender you also tend bar, but in Brooklyn. Have him sigh and shake his head yes and not really care (all good, I would do the exact same thing) haha.

Rise early and drive the Blue Ridge Parkway while the morning fog still sits below the peaks and everything is floating on a cloud it seems.

Take the countless tunnels and continue up till you find a view that makes you wonder if the first pair of eyes to look stayed dry or any others after. Remember the deer and bears and Cherokee who all breathed air cleaner still, which seems impossible.

Wander into a dim dive bar where a dog on the floor is the first to greet you and the bathroom is covered in graffiti and beer is $2 for happy hour.

Check out The Grey Eagle music hall and witness a reunion of local musicians all laughing and smoking cigarettes under an oak tree.

Wait for the show to start and be grateful for the framed portrait of Billy Joe Shaver on the wall and the five dollar cover charge.

Cut it up with the swinging opening band and then be thoroughly impressed when the lead guitarist switches to the drums for the headliner.

Sense the ole boy stalk the stage with paint spattered boots and a wayward cap and a selection of about six guitars.

Roar and sing and whistle and dance when the best harmonica player born after 1975 is called on stage to join the two guitar, heavy driving sound.

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